Thursday, April 22, 2010

Single Review: Blah Blah Blah

Oh boy. Ke$ha. I don't even know where to start with this human trainwreck. For my readers who prefer NPR, A&E, or French cinema, you probably have no idea who Ke$ha is. You're also not reading this blog because you have class and taste. Anyway, for those reading who don't know what Ke$ha is, this is Ke$ha:

Apparently this classy princess has been enjoying the nice weather at the park. Ke$ha is notorious for making trashy pop about going to the club, getting drunk, and molesting guys. Her whole persona is based on the idea that she wants to flip the trend of objectifying women. In other words, her songs almost always present men as an object--something only necessary for sexual gratification. YES WE KNOW! Women are treated terribly in pop music. I occasionally listen to rap when I'm angry, so I know these things. But I'm not quite sure Ke$ha's approach is going to change society. I was a math major so let me present Ke$ha's logic mathematically.

More objectification > Less objectification

Now that guys are being objectified, the issues associated with objectification will disappear! YES NO MORE SEXISM!

Conversely, Ke$ha might not care about the treatment of women in pop music and just wants to even the playing field. If objectification comes from all angles, then it's not a problem! We're all suffering equally! Although I think this just makes things worse, maybe some of the pop songs I've penned will finally get off the ground. Wait for "You're Just a Penismobile" to hit number one on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.

Anyway, I've managed to get this far without discussing the song at hand: Blah Blah Blah. I'm not a expert at noticing subtle themes, but I think this song is more or less about Ke$ha getting super drunk at a bar, taking a guy to the jukebox, and doing him nasty as long as he doesn't talk to her. Attention vaginas! This is empowering! You have the power to make really terrible decisions, just like men! Pop some Krystal, take it in a new hole, and perhaps get an STI!! YOUR GENDER IS SAVED, THANKS KE$HA!!

Honestly, I think all of this is moot. I don't think Ke$ha has an agenda aside from making money. To that end, I actually think she's quite brilliant. She's constructed an image that represents the increasingly popular trend of irresponsibility. TFLN, FML, Jeresy Shore, etc...society is getting more and more morally bankrupt. Promiscuity, alcoholism, and violence are increasingly valued and she's capitalizing on all of it. She writes almost all of her songs and therefore knows exactly what she's doing and trying to say. It's genius. As someone who enjoys alcohol and being touched in his swimsuit area, I can relate to a song that encourages me to drink and get touched down thurr. This was the pitch meeting with her label:

Ke$ha: "Oh hay bois, I'm here 2 tell u about my new music ideas" (Yes, she speaks like bad texting).

Exec: "Um, ok well show us what you've got, but I mean that musically because I want you to put your pants back on."

Ke$ha: "Lolzcopter, alright i can dew that. This first song iz about SEXXXX!"

Exec: "Um, you can't even sing...but this 80's arcade game beat is CATCHY!!"

Ke$ha: "ROTFTMVWYW!!! Hahahahahahaha sweet. Wanna get drunk?"

Exec: "If being drunk and high all the time helps me write songs as catchy as this, then sign me up!"

And scene. Out of fairness, I've decided to include a real picture of Ke$ha for comparison. Tell me this doesn't give you deja vu.

I don't even know. Her songs are catchy, but she's super untalented and is a big skank. Blah. Blah. Blah.

Rating: 2.5/5 stars

1 comment:

  1. I would like to point out that Kesha has 'appeared' on NPR in no less than two locations; Planet Money (probably because the producers saw the $ in her name and assumed she knew something about money) and on All things considered. As I don't have a TV, I can't comment on A&E-